The day my brother burned his butt
By Melodie Thurman
Growing
up in the hills of Arkansas was a real treat. Partly because of the snow the
other part was my smart brother. Some times the snow would get so deep we could
and did dig tunnels in it. Mike has always been a quick study. Have him
something once and he catches on real quick. Like pee on an electric fence is
something you don't do twice, or stick your tongue to a frozen pipe, or even
throw rocks at cows.
We
also had the luxury of the good ole outside toilet. Now in the warmer weather it
wasn't bad, you knew to look for the usual critters such as snakes and spiders.
But in the winter they didn't find it warm enough to hibernate so you didn't
have to waste any time looking around in the cold for them.
One
winter it was really cold to go outside and as a precaution to all our little
butts mom got some foam and would put it on the toilet seat so we wouldn't stick
to it. Some sort of insulation, any way we removed it while doing our business
then put it back when finished. Well needless to say it was bitter cold out when
Mike had to go. I'm not sure if he was in a hurry due to the cold or to get on
the pot, regardless he didn't take time to remove the foam and sat there on it
to do his business. Well his little bottom got froze to it and here he comes
into the house with it hanging on.
Mom
wasn't home at the time so no words of wisdom to comfort him. I suggested
pouring water on the foam, but the wise one said it would make a mess and we
would have to clean it up. See how smart he is. He decided to back up to the
stove and let it thaw naturally. Well, his butt was so cold he couldn't feel the
heat penetrating the foam nor did he feel it fall off. But when he bent over he
realized to late that the foam was no longer there but worse yet he was entirely
to close to the stove. The first thing I heard was the quick sizzle of his
little butt then came the screaming pain. Needless to say he never got in such a
hurry to go without removing the foam again.
And, that's that.
